BOULOGNE, FRANCE 1993

CONFIRMATION SENT TO EACH PIKE
From the Pikehand Archive
Nos chers pikehands,
      We are now able to confirm that Pikehand '93 will take place on 7th, 8th, 9th May 1993 from late morning on the Friday to early afternoon on Sunday. Accommodation has been booked and a deposit has been deposited by the depositors, so early notification of the inability to attend is vital.
      You are herby informed, in all seriousness, straight up, no messing, that you will require a passport for travel within EEC countries. (THIS IS NOT A JOKE!!!!)
      Those of you who need reassurance at this point may like to know that the travelling time from home will be less than for some previous weekends, and that the total cost will be no more than last year.
      You may also wish to know that an ability to speak French will enhance your point-scoring potential. Start practice now with this useful little phrase.
      CA VA BIEN, MADEMOISELLE, ON PEUT SE FIER A MOI, JE SUISE UNE MAIN DE PIQUE. (I'ts alright, miss, you can trust me, I'm a pikehand)
      Further information, early April! See you all at the party!
      Au revoir, nos petits pois,
            Graham & Pete.

AND THE INVITE
Bonjour les piques,
      As promised here are your joining instructions for Friday 7^th May. We will assemble at 15 Ivy House Road, New owners now Whitstable, before 11.00 a.m. We will be leaving this address at 11.30 a.m. sharp, so if you are unable to make this deadline you must inform the organisers well in advance. If you hit problems en route to Whitstable and are likely to be late phone us on ?????
      We will be travelling from Whitstable in two cars, with Pete and Bob as drivers. All other cars can be left in Ivy house road until Sunday, when you should be able to leave Whistable by 2.30 p.m.
      You will be spending a certain proportion of the intervening time on foreign soil, so you must bring a valid passport. Enclosed is an E111 application in case you do not already posses one.
USEFUL INFORMATION
      You may require a small amount of Frence currency for your personal use during the weekend. In order to save on bank charges, we can order this for anyone who so desires. If you wish to take advantage of this facility you should send a cheque to Pete to arrive on or before April 30.^th
      We will be taking both cars to France, and there will be the opportunity to visit a hypermarket. Most such places accept credit cards.

Gra and Pete were organisers. Also attending were Alan, Bob, Bryan, Gra, Jeff, Neil, Nick.C, Paul, Pete and Ray. We met at Dot and Ken's house as it was conveniently located. In true Piking fashion, Neil failed to read any of the pre-information provided by our wonderful organisers. He was very surprised that we were leaving the country so was minus a passport. Never the less we proceeded with our plans. Pete and Bob were drivers. We were to take the hydrofoil. However it was blowing a gale, the waves were too high so the hydrofoil was not running. We were redirected to Dover. We boarded at Dover unchecked as Border Control had been advised ahead. One of us was therefore an illegal immigrant. Comme ci comme ça waved through into France. No trouble because like Pike organisers, British Customs can always be relied upon. In convoy then to our hotel.

It was a multi-storied and quite dingy place. Our priority was drink and food in that order. We soon found, or were directed to, the French equivalent of a real ale bar. All lager type beers but good all the same. Paul, the Connoisseur of real ale, was not impressed. The cache he brought with him was finished. He was bereft. "When in France," quote rings a bell. However all partook. It was good enough so we visited again throughout the weekend. Whilst in the bar Pete (in his best French) was explaining to the barman that we were all part of the same family pointing out relationships. He explained that Graham and Bryan were brothers to which the barman cast a shadow of doubt. Pete then said, "Their mother had a bike!" A puzzled expression appeared on the barman's face then suddenly the centime dropped and he got the humour. Throughout the remainder of our stay the story was passed around his usual customers who also enjoyed the joke. Fed and wined we later meandered back to the hotel to find we were locked out. Jeff tried his agility by scaling a drain pipe. not sure if he made it. The owner raced up in a car and let us in.

Pikes are considerate; sometimes! With hardly any noise we bedded down in our rooms. Now you might think that the night would be restful. It was for most Pikes but this was a weekend where Neil's experiences dominated. Part way through the night he was awoken by a little boy climbing into his bed. Alarmed he calmed the youngster, who had no English. Mind you Neil's French was more sparce than his dad's. The boy had left his parents room to find the pissoir and in drowsiness had lost his way back and gone into a likely door. Quickly donning suitable attire Neil, with the boy, wanders the corridors to find the parents bedroom, which after some failures eventually he succeeds in doing. Responsibility discharged who would dare to suggest that Neil is lost!!

Our cultural activity the following day was each Pike to buy something unusual to eat for a picnic lunch. As a precaution every Pike had to eat some of what he had bought. There was wide variety of savoury, sweet and other foodstuff. We had great fun. No Pike ever refuses a challenge. There were plenty of facial expressions and near choking results. All survived including Neil. Another assignment required of the Pikes during the weekend was to acquire 1) The most useful item and 2) the most useless item. Visitor you are left to make your own choice into which category the following items fall.

French Flag Brit AttirePotShell

Comme ci comme ça straight onto the homeward hydro foil for Blighty. Now isn't that very accommodating of the French Customs again? The swell was still quite high. Happily the craft is quick. All Pikes were more than relieved to get off. There was quite a queue of cars for passport control. Neil was acquainted with the, up to armpit length, Marigolds British Customs applied if no drugs were forthcoming. The rest of us were none too sure of our own safety either. Five men in the car one of them an illegal immigrant. Waiting in the queue was torturous. "Passports Please," demanded the uniformed official. Quizzically he examined each passing it back to its owner in turn. Singling Neil out, "Where's Yours?" he barked. "We're in the EU now so I don't need one!" exclaimed Neil hopefully. Balancing closeness of knocking off with lateness home to his daunting wife the officer exclaimed, "Be off!! Don't do it again!!" Neil has a charmed life. That ended our excursion to France.

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